Disappointment

or the wrong word for a much bigger feeling

It’s too early for me to talk about this election. I’m too raw. I have too many friends and family who are scared for their businesses, their rights, some their lives. I also have too many friends and family who are elated for the same exact reasons.

It’s hard to parse out.

I’ve left social media (mostly—I still have to use it for work) because of this. Not because I don’t like seeing or hearing other points of view, but because the socials make it way too easy to become instantly pissed off, terrified, validated, and self-righteous and way too many people post on those knee-jerk reactions without actually researching or educating themselves about what they are posting or reposting. I can not tell you how many times I’ve seen things even like-minded friends post that I instantly do a quick check on to see if it’s true. Most of the time it’s a simple check. Many times it’s either fake, a questionable stretch, or completely false. Or a combination thereof.

The insane amount of hateful, misinformed, and targeted content—content that is specifically made for those reasons I just mentioned because it keeps you glued and keeps putting money in the content creators’ pockets—that is being pushed to our feeds that we didn’t ask for, is infecting our brains and our hearts, and I’m no longer going to let it infect mine. This is not the media, not journalists, not experts. I’m not saying all online content is bad. It’s not. But there are content creators who are making money off your incessant scrolling. Brands spend billions a year on content creators; imagine what folks are doing with your political views, your religions, the industries you work for, imagine the influence that you don’t even notice because you’re just so used to seeing it. The allegory of the frog in a pot of water.

Disappointed is not the word for how I feel post-election. I am angry. Very confused. As a woman, once again, I feel hated by this country. I can’t imagine how women of color feel right now. But I’m not going to scroll or post incessantly about it—anger on socials is not activism, it’s not taking action. It’s not news. It’s not therapy. It’s nothing but capitalized entertainment.

I know some people feel we should just blast our truths, what we think is right and good and important to try to overcome the “others”. But I think these platforms need to be reduced to what they started out as: social connection, or eradicated alltogether. I refuse to continue contributing to the info-tornado in that manner. I’m not going to blame certain parties or even certain sub-sets of parties. It’s a complicated issue that can’t be boiled down to a single cause. But I do know that our new social media version of an information hub is broken and we cannot let it become the new way to elect presidents.

I’m also afraid it’s too late.

So, I’m going to get to work doing the work I know how to do. Write.

But first I’ll leave you with these few statistics as a reminder.

• 1 in 3 women experience domestic violence

• 1 in 5 women have been raped

• Nearly 9 out of 10 women are killed by men they know

Yes, men also experience these things, no question. But who is most often doing the harm?

• There are more cases of domestic violence among males living with male partners than among males who live with female partners.

• Females living with female partners experience less domestic violence than females living with males.

And lastly,

• The presence of a gun in domestic violence situations increases the risk of homicide for women by 500%.

• More than half of women killed by gun violence are killed by family members or intimate partners.

In the majority of all cases: Men hurt and kill women. Men hurt and kill men.

This is one reason why I voted for Harris. One of many reasons.

But why would a country with these kinds of stats ever elect a woman?

Jessica Rinker

Because a woman president means change is possible

Because she’s a woman. That’s why I’m voting for Kamala Harris. It sounds simplistic. Or maybe too general. Sexist. Discriminatory. Decisions can’t be based on sex at birth. One can’t vote for a woman simply because they are a woman! 

But historically, remember how often women have been told you can’t—play baseball, be a firefighter, open a checking account, choose a partner, make decisions for your body, have a credit card, be in the military, practice law, get a passport, lead a congregation, run the Boston Marathon, refuse sex with your husband—because you’re a woman.

It’s the last one that got me when I learned it wasn’t until 1993 that marital rape was finally illegal in all fifty states. And despite all the “yes you can” that women have now, we still live in a country where three women a day die at the hands of their male partner. Ms. Harris will fight for women’s safety. She’s already proved it’s part of her agenda. I believe she will continue to make America a safer place for women by fighting to end violent crimes against women. She is a strong proponent of the Violence Against Women Act, and, as a prosecutor, she prioritized domestic violence cases, lobbied for red flag laws, prohibited stalkers from possessing firearms, and introduced legislation that expands legal representation for victims of domestic violence. A woman president means change is possible. A woman president means representation for a large demographic that has made incredible strides in the last several decades, and yet are still beaten by their partners every day or die. I believe Kamala Harris will do whatever she can to end this. 

You know what else women were told they couldn’t do? Vote. 

So, I’m voting for Kamala Harris because she is a woman. 

You can read the rest of these well-written and thought-through reasons from many respected, thoughtful, and concerned people here: 270reasons.com